We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
