Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
