reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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