i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
