you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Green mimosas i think yes
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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