How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
