Midget sex pt 2 tonight
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
