honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
