Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
