My first STD was from a foam party
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
we should paint friendship bongs
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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