Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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