Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I supernannyed him into submission
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
