He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize