I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
