why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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