That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
