So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Randomize
