roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
The Olympian is in my bed
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
