Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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