with your own penis?
I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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