If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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