I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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