he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize