He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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