This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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