There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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