I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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