Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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