Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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