Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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