508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
