Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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