and my herpes radar will keep us safe
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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