Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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