My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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