drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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