I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Randomize
