All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
