Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
