Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
