Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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