If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
