my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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