we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
