ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
