And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
