Kiss
Puke
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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