I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
