i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
