i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
time to smoke my breakfast
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
She bit a glass in half.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize